The perils of being a single woman

DISCLAIMER: If you have met your soul mate on the internet – don’t read this.

So. Yes. The whole “weekly blog updates” were a ridiculous idea that I just couldn’t stick to. This will only be my third post in a whole year! But perhaps one of my many resolutions for 2013 will be to update it a little more regularly!

Other new year’s resolutions will include: be thin, don’t be a smoker and stop over-complicating things. In many ways I’m in a similar position to when I started this blog last year, but at the same time am living a totally different life.

I’m now a journalist (hence the shorter paragraphs!) and living with Rachel. Both of these things are quite excellent. The job is hard. I can’t deny that it’s been the biggest challenge of my life but, then, most days I leave the newsroom feeling happy, not every day of course… But there’s a lot to be said for having a job you enjoy. It makes up a large chunk of your life. Why waste your time doing something you hate?

Rachel is a great housemate. It’s lovely being able to talk girly things with her late into the night. We are counselor and confidante to each other.

But this blog has mainly been used as a platform for me to get things off my chest so here goes! I’m single again. Through a mere practicality. The other day Rachel convinced me to do online dating. I was very reluctant, especially because I don’t really want a boyfriend at the moment… I mean obviously I wouldn't turn Ryan Gosling down, but who would? Many straight men wouldn't.

So I signed on up to a site which I was told was quite ‘good’… not sure how you define a good dating website? Fewer perverts? A more handsome selection of menfolk? Anyway I did it. The worst part for me was filling out the ‘self-summary’ part. I know that a lot of people would struggle with this. I felt so egotistical (not that I was writing ‘OH I’M SO GREAT’) it was just awful.

Now, this is the part that annoyed me. Even BEFORE I had written A SINGLE THING about myself, what I did, my personality etc. Men started messaging me.

Now, I know that this is how these things work. You go on first impressions. But I was getting pretty full-on messages within minutes of setting up my profile.

In a day I got 26 messages. I should have been flattered but instead the feminist in me reared its head and said NO THIS IS NOT FOR ME. All the people on these sites do is look at your face and email you. They don’t even look to see if you have even the slightest things in common.

I don’t know exactly what it was that bothered me. But for one thing, I’m really polite, I didn't think I could ignore the messages of the men I wasn't interested in. But then I got stressed because I couldn't keep emailing all of them… then I would have been accused of stringing them along.

Also, there wasn't anyone that I thought was ‘for me’ anyway. The one or two pretty men were way out of my league and it was all just a bit stressful. So I deleted my account after less than 24 hours.

THE WORST PART though, came when one of the really full-on people GOOGLED ME AND FOUND ME ON TWITTER! Then sent me a tweet saying I was his “perfect match.”

NO. NO I AM NOT. BECAUSE I SAY SO. DOES MY OPINION OF YOU COUNT AT ALL? NO?

Excuse all the capitals here, as you can tell I was a bit pissed off about it.

Internet dating has worked wonders for many of my friends and family members. But it simply is not for me. I see it as a vast, horny, superficial cattle market. I don’t have the patience for it.

Also, as I said, I’m not dying to be in a relationship. I guess my motivation for joining was really so Rach and I could have a giggle about it.

BUT IT WASN’T FUNNY IT WAS JUST SAD.

I suppose I’m an old Romantic. I’m of the belief that love should happen organically. And yes, this attitude may leave me single for the rest of my days, but I’d rather that than be pounced on by 26 men I have no interest in.