Resolutely wavering

Well. After perusing my bloggy stats I found that 43 people read my last post. Thanks! 

Although, of course, I don’t know if you were reading it and thinking “JESUS SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP” or “YOU CAN’T WRITE” or “THIS IS INCREDIBLY DULL”. But, as I've decided not to over-complicate things this year I will just take it on face value and conclude that this blog IS worth writing.

For the third time in my blogging history I will say the following… You don’t have to read any of this.

Okay. Onward.

This week we gained a new housemate. A lovely creature who goes by the name of Chris Mallett. I've observed his behavior and made some sketches. So far I have learned that he is a sociable beast with a passion for running and ironing shirts. His mating dance (aimed at best friend/housemate Rachel) consists of smiling and flashing brightly coloured feathers in her general direction. So far she seems quite impressed.

Our New Year’s Eve was good. We had a miniature pub crawl. Rach and Chris were not drinking so at one point I was propping up the bar in the Exeter Arms asking the barman about their many varieties of rum.

Me: “What’s Kraken?”

Bartender: “Rum”

Me: “Great. Can I try some?”

Bartender: “Yes”

I repeated this process until I was quite drunk (for free) and had a lovely night. At the end of the Eve Rachel, Chris and I stood upon a bench to watch the fireworks over Derby. I said to my friends: “Which one word would you like to describe 2013 once it’s over?” The response: “Better, badgers and romance.”

I was in bed by 12.30 but didn't really mind.

Also on 31/12/12 Rachel and I smoked our final cigarettes (to be entirely honest mine was smoked in the early hours of 1/1/13 but never mind all that.)

We've both purchased electronic cigarettes and on this, our third day of not smoking, have reached a kind of irritable delirium. Earlier, Rachel looked in my face, laughing wildly and said: “I hate my life hahahaha.” It’s actually quite a pleasant state of affairs. I feel incredibly cheery. Please note the lack of SHOUTING as seen in my last post.

I like being able to “smoke” in a variety of interesting places (bathroom, newsroom, cupboard) safe in the knowledge that it won’t kill me. A colleague told me I smell better (what on earth did I smell like before?) and I can concentrate for longer. But all this aside I do feel about 12% less cool.

Last night I booked tickets to Peru to see my beautiful and wondrous step-sister in April. I’m so excited. When I think about it my feet dance about completely of their own volition. I won’t write any more about this because it will just turn into a STRING OF CAPITAL LETTERS AGHHH IT’S GOING TO BE SO GREAT.

See? I’ll stop that now. But yay!

So 2013 so far has been most excellent. My other new year’s resolutions include:

• Do something slightly immoral every day (with a view to writing a novel about it later) this one is not going that well at all! I’m naturally quite a moral person so I struggle coming up with ideas.
• As I've mentioned before: don’t over-complicate things. I don’t think I’ll ever be good at this.
• Get fit/be thin. It’s the 3rd of January, give me a break.
• Read more… I've always been a bookworm but I want to level up to SUPER-BOOKWORM. So far I've read 0.25 books. What I’d really like to do is read all the unread books in my bookshelf. There’s about 30 of them and they make me feel guilty whenever I look at them. One of them is “The Oxford Companion to the Mind” which is only there to make me look cool. I won’t read this. I’ll never read it.  

So those resolutions are looking a little less successful but let us not forget number five.

• BLOG MORE – I’m doing it, I’m doing it. Leave me alone.